Parent-child Dynamics Lover Gifts

'Mom, would you have married Dad if you had seen him in high definition first?'

'Okay, Mom. I'm sorry I re-gifted one of the kidneys you gave me.'

"Truth is relative at these reunions. It depends on which relative you talk to."

"Your momma lied to you, boy."

'I see from your C. V. that you're my son...'

Boy on father's knee

"Sorry I'm late with my grades. I was busy removing the 'Honor Roll' bumper sticker from the car."

"It's another e-mail from your folks. You know, this would be a whole lot easier if you'd just tell them about the Web."

'I didn't hear you calling. I can't listen to everybody who yells at me.'

Young Godzilla.

'Dad, try to catch some jellyfish to go with my peanut butter.'

'Do you think Mum and Dad are trying to keep an eye on us, by enroling on the same university course as us, Colin?'

"Damn it, agree to whatever she demands. No matter what it takes, I want my mommy."

Old and young

"Stickers, fairy tattoos, a coloring book ... but no, Mom, I'm not seeing any stretch-mark cream in the goody bag."

'Little Tommy took the cap off the sauce bottle when he got home from school in the end.'

'Dad, when do I stop being a wholly owned susidiary of you and Mom?'

"My mom still makes all my clothes by hand."

'And I said to him: 'Actually, I'm the white sheep of the family'...'

"Jack and Nina's concern grew when their son, James, confided in them that his imaginary friend was, in fact, a short-tempered snapping turtle."

'Pick up your feet when you walk.'

'Young man, face it. There's not going to be a regime change around here!'

"Surely, Son, you can find something to paint indoors."

"I told mom I won't answer her calls in case a scammer got her number."

'A cow is called 'productive livestock' because it gives milk. Parents are productive livestock, too, because they give pocket money.'

"My four-year-old son usually helps me, but he's at his grandparents' home."

"You call that a made bed?"

Naive.

'Bring your birth certificate when you pick me up - My Dad will want to see it.'

'I see by your resume that you are my son. If this checks out, the job is yours.'

Motherhood and Apple Pie.

"Adam, it's the boys. You've got to do something about their fighting! I swear someday one of them is going to kill the other one!"

'First time grandfather hey! Me, I'm a great great great great great great great grandfather...'

'How many times do I have to tell you? Go and wash your trunk before dinner!'

Wife Knitting Using Wool from Husband's Sweater.