Parent-child Dynamic Gifts

'The Sex Pistols? Oh, Dad...you're such a square!'

'Okay, Mom. I'm sorry I re-gifted one of the kidneys you gave me.'

"Mom, please! I'm a married woman whose friends have been reviewed favourably by the New York Times."

"Your momma lied to you, boy."

'I see from your C. V. that you're my son...'

Boy on father's knee

"Sorry I'm late with my grades. I was busy removing the 'Honor Roll' bumper sticker from the car."

"It's another e-mail from your folks. You know, this would be a whole lot easier if you'd just tell them about the Web."

'If you don't behave we'll unfreeze your stem cells!'

Young Godzilla.

"Bah! in my day bands knew how to play their computers properly. Like Kraftwerk"

"I didn't know you could do worse than an F. When did they start handing out poop emojis?"

'Do you think Mum and Dad are trying to keep an eye on us, by enroling on the same university course as us, Colin?'

'Dad, try to catch some jellyfish to go with my peanut butter.'

"I was thinking of joining a parenting class."

'Mom, would you have married Dad if you had seen him in high definition first?'

A woman carrying a child carrying a teddy bear

'It's all right with me if you go out, but you'll have to file a flight plan with your father.'

"I’ve changed my mind. I no longer want to conquer the world. I just want to conquer those two..."

'Around here your mom is the management. I'm just the middle management.'

"If you're not a good boy, Santa will bring you only educational toys."

"Stickers, fairy tattoos, a coloring book ... but no, Mom, I'm not seeing any stretch-mark cream in the goody bag."

'Dad, when do I stop being a wholly owned susidiary of you and Mom?'

Teaching kids to count is fine - teaching kids what counts is best.

"Jack and Nina's concern grew when their son, James, confided in them that his imaginary friend was, in fact, a short-tempered snapping turtle."

"What's it to be Dad? Two quid or Handels water music in G flat?"

"My teacher noticed you weren't at parent teacher night. She wanted to ask you why I never take an interest in anything."

'Pick up your feet when you walk.'

'I've got to have a talk with my mother. She thinks the stork brought me.'

"You call that a made bed?"

Naive.

"I told mom I won't answer her calls in case a scammer got her number."

'Young man, face it. There's not going to be a regime change around here!'

"My four-year-old son usually helps me, but he's at his grandparents' home."

"Surely, Son, you can find something to paint indoors."