Paranoia Explorer Gifts

'Maybe you just miscounted your paperclips.'

Library. Read. Careful! The books on paranoia you're looking for are quickly coming up right behind you!

Stingy lodger is suspicious of the servant girl

"Ever wonder what people are up to behind your back?"

'Es-yay. E's-hay ere-hay ight-ray ow-nay and-ay e-hay oesn't-day uspect-say a ing-thay!'

'Don't mind my husband, he just wants to be 65!'

'Agnes, do you ever get the feeling you're being watched?'

Prepared for any situation.

My Bookshelf Before the Internet

"And do you, Deborah Tannen, think they know what they're talking about?"

'You can't be serious! They wash you by dipping you in a tub of water! That's horrible!'

No Immediate Danger

"Fantastic! Do you realize what we've just stumbled upon? It's the fabled Lost Glove Compartment of the Ancient Astronauts!"

The Physiciatrist...

'It's a program on paranoia. Every time I leave the room, they stop and wait for me to come back.'

"My dream is to have a little house and a white picket fence wired with explosives."

"You dropped yer wallet."

"What do you mean you can't stand to be touched?"

'Life is like a trough, Mr. Fisk. How much slop you get out of it depends on how much slop you put into it.'

"Honey, why don’t you tell Tony and Karen about your microdosing-healing-group thingy or whatever the heck it is?"

Id/Ego/Superego.

"Is this as good a bad time as any other bad time you've experienced?"

"Should we lick it again?" CX930226

Reflection (with bubbles)

Don't Take No For an Answer

Prepper Dog

Ins and Outs of Sex Therapy

"It's Eden. You don't have to keep checking for ticks."

This is your brain on cartoons

'Under new business, is anyone wearing a wire?'

"Oh no, not another pandemic!"

'I can't shake off this feeling we're being watched.'

(I'm afraid someone is going to expose me as a phony, a fraud, … A complete charlatan.) (Uh, oh! He's on to me!)

'Do you get the feeling we're being watched?'

"I've got to go now. I've got patients of my own to see."