Paperback Purist Gifts

Books On Paper

I just bought a new Kindle Voyage. It's much better than my Kindle Paperwhite. Blasphemy, little buddy. A real man lugs around a paperback that he's milled from a fallen Redwood that he lifted off of a baby deer, before reuniting the fawn with its mother. I bought it off of Amazon. I didn't even use "one-click." I used the shopping cart and chose all the options manually. Almost as impressive. I keep it old-school.

I've read fifteen books in the last three months, Randy. What? You? Read? Books were invented 5 thousand years ago, little buddy

It's so quaint that you're reading a book. Stuff it. You really should get a e-reader. They're hip, great-looking. The future. And apparently you can get really good books on them. Apparently? Owning it is the main thing. Reading is for book people. I fear truth in this.

Non-Digital Content Delivery Devices

'My penmanship has really improved since I got a laser printer.'

This is a 'text book' it's a bit like a website but printed on paper.

Not to be a motion picture. Will remain just a book.

Rare Books

'Bring out yer books!'

Two Generations of Readers

Up-to-date Career-Specific Romance Novels

Page not found...

Technology and literature

The Last Non E-Book In The World.

"It makes me happy that you took time to read the newspaper today."

'Be careful! She loves to curl up by the fire with a good author!'

Books*. *Batteries not included.

'My battery is dead. How does it end?'

"They published my letter about recycling newspapers."

What's that, Lance? It's called a newspaper. It's like a Kindle, but instead of your fingers leaving smudges, they get smudged.

"So obvious, there all the time"

Information might travel at the speed of light, but the news still travels at the speed of sound bites.

'I used to be somebody. . . I used to be a contender. . .'

"Actually, I'm sitting here reading a book—just to see if I can still do it."

"Far out Nigel, I know you're a purist, but at some point, you'll need to switch to e-books like the rest of us..."

Man Covers Up Television in Favour of Books.

"The people in my new novel have started rejecting print media. That's a bad omen."

"I'm binge ignoring everything you're binge watching."

"Help! I've fallen into obscurity and I can't get up!"

'I'm looking for something not written by a celebrity.'

Hoping to encourage readers to buy the hard copy of the paper, the Journal Times Herald, only printed every other word in its online edition.

Ed Goes Green

"I used a ghost writer for the book, but I wrote all of the online reviews myself."

"A paperback?! Iv'e got hundreds of books saved on this."