Paperback Devotee Gifts

"What a Luddite! I bought him a Kindle, but he'll only read hard copy."

"You're going to hate yourself."

Television Readers.

"First Lady Lettuce goes missing, then Colonel Crouton followed by Reginald Radish... Great Caesar's Ghost! Someone is making a salad!"

Rare Books

'Bring out yer books!'

"Where are you guys going?" "We’re out of here!" "It’s October 28th!" "The new team are running late. We need you to stay until February 2025!" "But I’m tired!!" "How do we know they won’t bail on us again?"

Two Generations of Readers

Up-to-date Career-Specific Romance Novels

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'We loved this book. Twenty nine experts tell you how to think independently.'

'Your proposal sounds interesting. Can you send me a written proposal? I cannot reread a phone call.'

"Just when I think things couldn’t get any worse, they replace The Lockhorns with Doonesbury!"

The Last Non E-Book In The World.

3:00 pm - Meet the author

'Be careful! She loves to curl up by the fire with a good author!'

A man sits behind a table in a book store with a sign that reads "Take the author to lunch 1 P.M."

Books On Paper

'My battery is dead. How does it end?'

Snowman outside library.

"In my spare time, I write reviews on Goodreads."

'I used to be somebody. . . I used to be a contender. . .'

"Can't you forget the FT for once?"

'Has this kid's book been Oprah-approved?'

"Sorry honey. I can't sleep. I'm going to copy and collate for awhile."

Non-Digital Content Delivery Devices

"Idolistentopodcastsatdoublespeed. How'dyouknow?"

"Actually, I'm sitting here reading a book—just to see if I can still do it."

Under the microscope

''Life, liberty, and the pursuit of the almighty dollar' is too long. Let's change it to 'happiness.''

"Help! I've fallen into obscurity and I can't get up!"

"This advice column is the worst trash I've ever read! And I should know! I've been reading it every day for the past 20 years!"