Paper Shuffler Gifts

'I bet those are the accident reports.'

"I'm still righting wrongs. And you?

'I always feel at the end of the day I could've taken credit for more.'

'You like my in-tray full, don't you?'

Procrastinators Anonymous

I've always wanted to quit while I was ahead but the opportunity never presented itself.

"Yes Sir, I'm still working on the 'ins and outs' of their proposal."

Interior design trends for parents....

'Today the stock market was moribund, as growth equities sputtered and bonds dipped due to the inverted yield curve. I'd translate that into layman's terms...but they don't pay me enough.'

'I have much less stress since I replaced my in box with a paper shredder.'

In, out, shake it all about.

Origami horse leaping out of a book about origami

"Those are the failed attempts at my first novel."

'Yes, your papers seem to have lots of citations, but I've checked: They're all self-citations...'

'Once again, I fold.'

"Someday we will escape from this prison."

'Bring me an in basket and an out basket and some paperwork to shuffle between them.'

'Sometimes I wonder what I's do without you!'

Pelican and Origami

'You've never planted potatoes before have you?'

Co-pilot smirks at paper airplane stuck in the hair of the pilot

'Father, meet Sister Kate, she shimmies like a jelly upon a jelly plate.'

"I think he's going to be a bus driver - he loves cutting things up."

"No, Thursday's out. How about never - is never good for you?"

Origami Mail

A cat composer

"How do you spell time management?"

"It's a 300 page government questionnaire about cutting back on bureaucracy."

'Your proposal's on my desk right now, though I have to admit, I've made some significant changes.'

'Ok, the cat's away. Time to play.'

'Have you heard about the origami shop?'

"You're confusing me with someone else. I'm in Document Destruction and I just need to get to your shredder bin."

"Let's face it, this meeting isn't about tightening our work schedule. It's about stretching our deadline."

'We're looking for someone who stays focused enough while multi-tasking to maintain a manageable blur.'

"Any other strengths?"