Palette Ponderer Gifts

Negotiations over the new colour scheme had reached stalemate.

Desert Painter

'You called me out of the blue... Cobalt, ultramarine, prussian, cerulean or phthalocyanine?'

'I WANTED to paint the room a shade of green, but gave up somewhere between chartreuse and citrine.'

'Sorry, Steve, but we're trading you to France for two impressionists and a dadaist to be named later.'

"Van Gogh has always been associated with the colour yellow. In your case I think the colour is mediochre!"

Crayo-Blah

The Art Student.

'On your mark. Get set. Create!'

"Is there any way I can un-drink this wine?"

A sign that reads "ART...and plenty of it!" hangs above the entrance to a museum.

'I wish you wouldn't bring your work home with you!'

'I'm going through my 'blue period' - all my other crayons have broken.'

"I appreciate you have a real passion for music Mr Hibberd. . . but I can see you're going to struggle with the piano."

"Big deal! My digital picture frame can hold a thousand pictures!"

I'm color blind, please help.

''Midnight in Paris' didn't work in the conference room. Let's try something more vibrant like 'Sunrise Over Wall Street.''

"Painted like this, finding furniture to match at least one colour should be simple!"

"Bingo, it's the hippy lady again! She always throws something interesting: last week it was honey-beer bread..."

"He had help. There were architecture specialists, costume specialists, angel specialists..."

"It's almost as if you can get lost in it, Timmy. Timmy?"

"But is it..?"

Divine Intervention

'If you're really open to change, you won't go South this year.'

Artist paints UNDO icon onto canvas.

Shadow Artist

"It's always Roy G. Biv this, Roy G. Biv that. Never Burnt Sienna!"

Fin (The end).

"Can we be seated under a vegan painting?"

A tree falls in a forest and no one is there to hear it.

'Face it, DuChamps -- you're in a rut.'

'I love an empty canvas...especially yours...'

'Intriguing how the eyes follow you round the room . . .'

'It's another canvasser dear'

"Oh, I can paint alright, but only miniatures..."