Pager Lover Gifts

'Joy, do me a favor. . . call my pager number. . . I wanna make sure it works. Wait 'til I go into the living room.'

'Noticeboard? I forgot it was there to be honest.'

'Past performance is not an indication of future results.'

Things-to-do-today: Daily workboxes piled up on desk.

Stan Mack's Real Life Funnies: The Science of Love

Romance

A heart shaped cake

"It's not the social stigma. It's the mercury."

"I just love the way you're so endlessly inventive in the bedroom."

"I love it when we clear up issues between us."

"If you let down your guard, I'll walk over the moat."

"I heard they mate for life."

Frog flirting.

Klimt Kiss Phones

"Must everything with you be a landmark decision?"

"I'm trying to forget a pussycat."

"But until I do transmute lead into gold, maybe I could interest you in some lovely lead jewelry."

"Not now, my love. I'm feeling preminstrel."

"Was that my pager or yours?"

'He may have an opposable thumb, but she has him wrapped around her little finger.'

"You can’t just go up the waterspout whenever you hear something you don’t like!"

"Sir, you're not on the list - we've checked it twice."

'I made my own list of My World's 100 Most Powerful Women!'

'Don't tell me how much you love me. Tell me how my stock is going.'

Words of Love

Fully aware of the dangerous romance of Venice's canals and bridges, Gwendolyn approached this moment with a degree of caution.

"You pulled most of the muscles in your back lifting your to-do list? You've got a bigger problem than pulled muscles."

Say it with flowers: It!

Why weren't we born rich instead of beautiful?

"Don't deny it. You only wanted me for my metadata."

'You've got to help me, Doc! I've got a crush on St. Valentine all Year!!'

Urns in love

'Hey, that one looks just like a visible mass of condensed water vapour floating in the atmosphere.'

"Sorry, Pal. Sometimes nature's not very pretty."