Outsourcing Aficionado Gifts

"I used to do it all myself, but now I have my lawyers handle it."

"You've got your corner office, so what more do you want?"

"I've just never worked anyplace where the 'alpha male' was a woman."

Ascent of Machine.

"Damnit, executive-trainees don't have 'accidents'."

'We're holding our own, but I'd really like to see some growth.'

Keeping all the balls in the air - skills

'And the best thing about this electric thermal underwear is, no batteries, it's solar!'

Manufacturing will take place in China...So what role does Europe have?...you borrow money to be the customer

'Now this is exactly what I was referring to when I talked about 'scope creep'.'

'I tried to warn him - garbage in, garbage out.'

Counting part time employees is the new math.

Big Shot/Bigger Shot.

"You're quitting? You're walking out?? Couldn't you have at least waited until I finished outsourcing the company??!"

The little engine that could delegate.

'If we hadn't outsourced the staff, we could've eaten them.'

'I'm still employed, but to save on utility costs, they offshored me.'

Corporate Whore.

'Isn't that a little extreme? - Cloning yourself just so you can use the carpool lane?'

Desk shaped like an office block.

Female business.

Monday around 9PM.

'You wiseaces who said, this factory would move to China are wrong! It's moving to India!'

Businessman has Sterling Sign Shaved in Head.

'We outsource our grape juice, marketing, bottling and distribution, and yet he's supposed to give a speech tonight on winemaking - bosses,outsources,outbetter show him what a grape looks like.'

-"What has this got to do with communication?" -"It's my invention...the hand smiley."

"I've no idea what he said...but he's so darned cute."

"Why didn't we think of that?"

"Hold your questions until I've talked so long no one knows or cares what you're asking about."

Welcome to Yellow Pages, Vermont

"Queen begins with Q, it should be precisely here."

"This universal remote is awesome. It controls the tv, cable, stereo, computer, garage door. . ."

'He was always too busy to sit for his portrait.'

Janet always was ahead of the curve...she outsourced herself.