Outsourcing Expert Gifts

Counting part time employees is the new math.

'We outsource our grape juice, marketing, bottling and distribution, and yet he's supposed to give a speech tonight on winemaking - bosses,outsources,outbetter show him what a grape looks like.'

'The 'insourcing' will go ahead and some jobs will be off to Leeds or Manchester, but I think I'll be safe...'

Manufacturing will take place in China...So what role does Europe have?...you borrow money to be the customer

Pull the udder one

'If we hadn't outsourced the staff, we could've eaten them.'

"You're quitting? You're walking out?? Couldn't you have at least waited until I finished outsourcing the company??!"

'I'm still employed, but to save on utility costs, they offshored me.'

"Thanks, but I already have my 'support bubble' right here."

Oh no ... Outsourcing

'You wiseaces who said, this factory would move to China are wrong! It's moving to India!'

Janet always was ahead of the curve...she outsourced herself.

"You question my methodology? Perhaps you should question your questionology."

Export

"OK, I think we're pretty much back to square one. You can stop now."

'Bonny, I've forgotten...What time is that 9 o'clock meeting tomorrow?...'

'Sir, we've drilled so deep this time that we've reached Arab oil.'

List making as therapy.

'I'm afraid we're going to have to let you go...we've just sourced somebody in Mumbai who's 34% better at being you for 29% less!'

"I'm here to thank you. The suffering index is much higher since you outsourced your customer service and tech support overseas."

'As you know, this is a Right-To-Work-Cheap-OR-we-send-your-job-to-Asia-state...'

'All the leading economic indicators,have been outsourced to india.'

My husband is a world expert, but unfortunately it's only on maganese bronze.

Outsaucing - A dollop of sauce has been put on a customer's plate from a long arm from afar.

Let the profit-making begin!

"I thought you were the one who sent jobs overseas."

'If a job's worth doing, the Japanese have probably already doing it..'

'I'm afarid your son has all the classic elements of geekism,minus the technical expertise.'

'I'm not calling you in India for technical support. I'm calling to offer you a job.'

"We managed to outsource our strategic development team to a company in Beijing that will say 'yes sir no sir' for 25% less."

"We're considering outsourcing your job. Could you explain to this guy in Guatemala whatever it is you do around here?"

'Do you realize this is the third time we've packed up and moved to Canada?'

A Vet? I had you picked in advertising.

'We believe in putting people before profits. We put people in China to leave more profits here.'

It's often meant as a compliment, but in this case saying he's "in a class by himself" is not a good thing.