Outdoor Survival Fan Gifts

"I believe I prefer crawling in the desert to crawling here in the artic."

Swinging

"Ticket and passport, please."

'I was thinking-what if the tide's OUT?'

ATM withdrawal

"Where can I find some peace of mind?"

"You see, honey, no lousy coronavirus is gonna get to us way out here."

This historic alpine hut has stood here among the native beech trees for over a century, and may stand for another, often unoccupied by always watched over by that ever playful mountain parrot, the Kea.

The World's best Camouflage Store.

Unlike modern day hipsters, pre-historic hipsters didn't need to rely on yoga, hiking or even rock climbing to stay fit...

"No, still there."

Japan Disaster: Japanese fighting Nuclear Grim Reaper.

'I'm in hock up to my ears, I work in a dead-end job for eight bucks an hour, my wife and girlfriend are both pregnant - and you think you need help!'

Broken down ambulance means horse and man have to carry stretcher

'Look, thanks for your concern, but I think a flood is something we can cope with!'

Head in the sand.

"Well yes, mongooses fight cobras, but to be truthful, only when we have to: It's a rather risky business..."

"Nothing better than a cosy brazer on a grim, wintry wind-blasted mountain top guard post."

'P.S. When finding this message please be sure to dispose of the bottle in a bona fide bottle bank.'

'Aren't you glad we decided not to fly north thing spring?'

"I hope we haven't come at a bad time."

The Kings Head.

'The fire brigade are on the way. But in the meantime, I'm totally posting this online.'

"I knew you'd come!"

"So, do I add an extra stroke, or what?"

Extreme camouflage

'I don't like it either, but it IS brain food.'

I hope you brought enough beer boxes for all the dads.

'We need to be more proactive less reactive.'

'The police arrived instantly when I had a heart attack, and firefighters saved my sister's life. But I don't want the government involved in my health care!'

"There are worse places to be beached."

'Be sure to save room for dessert!'

Golf Lady

"It's a great invention, but will it start up on cold mornings?"

'That's it, ol' boy, the fire's dying, we'll have to fight our way out. Ben...oh Ben?'