Outdoor Relaxation Fan Gifts

"I won't be in today. I've decided to live off the land."

"I hope you don't mind. I only brought a picnic pillow for myself."

I start teaching summer school next week...

'Lovely Sunset.'

"I figure if I was still employed, I wouldn’t get to spend all this time with you!"

"Ooh, ooh, I know this koan! I got it! Pick me! Pick me!"

'Will you please stop feeding the pigeons?!'

Swinging

it my imagination or is it getting warmer?"

Hot Pie Therapy

"I'm not angry, but in the future I’d prefer it if you chewed up her Sue Graftons, not my P.G. Wodehouses."

Pre-Television Man Caves

"The parasol certainly paid for itself this summer."

Life's a Bench.

A man gets a paper cut while reading in his back yard and is attacked by 'Lawn Sharks'.

'A loaf of bread, a jug of wine, a CD player, a laptop computer, a cordless phone and thou.'

'Um. . . I don't think that's a candy bar.'

This historic alpine hut has stood here among the native beech trees for over a century, and may stand for another, often unoccupied by always watched over by that ever playful mountain parrot, the Kea.

'Does the gym have a motorized version of this cycle?'

A man sitting in the grass reading

'A lovely day, a good meal, and, thank heaven, no guilt.'

"Where can I find some peace of mind?"

"I think he just ashed on me."

"He's 'getting the grill ready for summer,' which means he's washing out the beer cooler."

'Oh, for god's sake just ignore it!'

'Slices Mandy! Just slices!'

'Like I'm going to give this up to migrate.'

'Why is it that as soon as the sun comes out the flies come out too.'

'All the crabs you can eat, $1.00. But first you have to catch them.'

"You're right. The sunscreen does taste like ranch dressing."

A man walking a bowling ball is about to walk into a woman walking a bunch of bowling pins

"What … have … you … done?"

'I realize you love my boat, but you've been on it for nearly a month now. Do me a favor and go home.'

'They're clouds, Bob. You can't channel surf.'

'Everybody's entitled to have a hobby. Mine's growing grass.'