Outdoor Celebrations Gifts

'Raining? Naw. I was running through a sprinkler.'

Sparklers

Lesbian civil partnership.

Mardi Gras

"Whenever he shows up everything turns to crap!"

'Oh my God. I love it!'

"He's taken buzzed to a whole new level."

"It's not a party until someone gets plowed."

'Sooner or later, someone at the party will hand you a sandwich and a glass of wine - then what?'

"Thanks to my wedding planner, everyone in the wedding is still talking to each other."

Peephole in a pile of presents (colour).

Bacchus.

'It's the chef's special. His wife just had a baby.'

"She can walk the walk, but can she talk the talk?"

"Happy St Patrick’s Day"

The Grasshopper's Feast: A Prophetic Vision

"Hic. Gosh and begorrah!" "Wha?"

"Blow out the candles!" "Make a wish!" "I wish I had my testicles back."

Dancing Doctor

Bubbly

Wedding Day Itinerary.

Cardiac Recovery.

Beach Barbecue

'That'll be four twenty for the beers and sixty quid for the Xmas decorations.'

"And I'm teaming that burned sausage up with a warm, flat local lager."

"I ask that today is a good day...a day that brings family together...to show how we need one another."

Every time you make a blend, somewhere, a wine maker dies.

"Five hamburgers with buns, three hamburgers without buns and two buns, without hamburgers."

"And the winner is… Dan the Man by a nose!"

'Apparently the stag party has gone into extra time.'

"Fred's had too much to drink - now he's hitting on that old coat rack."

"Happy birthday, dear. You still have that sparkle in your eyes!" "That sparkle burned out years ago. These are cataracts."

"Attention, everyone! Here comes Poppa, and we're going to drive dull care away! It's quips and cranks and wanton wiles, nods and becks and wreathed smiles."

'How about joining us for a soda and pizza after the ceremony?'

Happy Turkey Day!