Orthopedist Gifts

Doctor to man: 'Now that's what I call a bum knee.'

'See? The idiots put my danged knee replacement in backward!'

'My instruments indicate you have water on the knee.'

"Knee replacement? Can I have it replaced with chocolate?"

"I'm afraid, Mr. Cottontail, that all that hopping down the bunny trail has taken a toll on your hips."

"I want you to pay your bill, but I refuse to do any arm twisting."

"Oh well, I'm off the see the orthopedist."

'Have you tried limping?'

Everytime I fan my tail feathers, I throw out my back.

'Who would like a little judo chop while you're waiting?'

"Well, the x-rays show you have a little arthritis in your hands, but mostly they're just poorly drawn."

'Looks like a perfectly healthy limb to me.'

'Don't use that arm... for a day or two!'

"Does it make my sacrum look big?"

A doctor statue and a patient statue

101 uses of a dead cat: peg leg

Foot

Orthopaedist

"Next on... Auto Mechanic M.D. Your knees are shot, so I'm going to try injecting some grease. If that doesn't work, I'll make you new knees from some shock absorbers."

Dog Doctor goes to door that says "Bone Scans"

The Pie Chart of Mystery

"Son, I’d say the ACL tear is the least of your problems."

"Wow, what a lovely pair of clavicles!"

Ornithotics

'The knee brace I prescribed, you put on over your head.'

'They're certainly the worst bow legs I've ever seen.'

"This is just a placebo cast, but it makes a lot of people feel better."

Woman walking a pelvis on a lead.

Athens Orthopedic Clinic. Sisyphus is here again doctor. Must be another repetitive stress injury.

Your plaster comes off today!

"I've been traded to another HMO for an orthopedist to be named later."

Sports Medicine

"You've got bunions, hammertoes and plantar fasciitis. Bad feet must run in your family." "Nobody runs in my family."

M.D. So the rhythmic pain has lessened? Yes, the beat has abated a bit!

You need a knee replacement -- We'll put in an actual spring in your step!