Organic Gifts

"We spent a small fortune buying all organic food to keep up with the Joneses."

'What motivated you to become a environmentalist?'

'Enjoy your meal! We grow everything ourselves!'

The Environmentalist

"Even the waiters here are organic."

The Endless Battle of the Organic Gardener

Homegrown solutions for a smaller carbon footprint.

But is it organic?

"We're odd looking but just as good."

Eco Princess

At the market

"Is the asparagus farm-raised or wild-caught?"

'Perfect. Do you deliver?'

'You may not feel any healthier right away, but you'll definitely feel more smug.'

"You ordered the organic, unprocessed, whole wheat spaghetti?"

"Still Undecided Political Blocs"

'Gosh, I dunno. You sure it's organic?'

'I'm collecting manure for my strawberries.' The woman says, 'I always put cream and sugar on mine.'

HELLth Food Sprouts

"Mulch madness"

"Being vegan or vegetarian isn't enough anymore. From now on I will only cook stuff I stepped in on the sidewalk."

"Well, son. . . here your dad makes the famous 'fresh from nature' food!"

"Oh, no - not another farmer's market!"

'My owner is feeding me way too much organic food.'

'Our health-care system - eat organically.'

Show and Tell: 'These came from our orgasmic garden.'

'You're still keen on organic gardening then!'

'Don't worry it's organic...'

Bio-Engineered Fruit of the Month Club

"Hold on. If we're free range, I don't think we should be crossing a toll road."

'Make it a microbrew, Jake! I've gone organic!'

'Our chickens are a real 'come back' story: raised organic, they hooked up with some seedy fowl, but then, thankfully, were saved by massive doses of antibiotics.'

'Want a mudpie? It's organic!'

'Who says you're not genetically manipulated?'

"I say we settle around here, there's no chemical aftertaste to the soil: Must be an organic farmer..."