Opening Medical Practice Gifts

'Now all I need is an office.'

'Well, what do I have?...Within reason, of course.'

Coming Soon - Maternity Clinic. Coming Soon After - Law Firm Dealing in Medical Malpractice.

Patent Attorney (invisible man)

"I hope you don't mind - I'm training a brand-new assistant and I've asked her to check your blood pressure."

Brew 'N' Brouhaha

No Cavity Club/No New Gum Receding Club

'I'm afraid it's bad news Mr.Hooper, I've just got the report on your finances.'

Separation

'Where's my glove?'

Auto parts, Lite Puff Pastries, & Health Insurance Exchange.

"Are you sure you're not holding your breath?"

'I object, Your Honor! Hearsay evidence!'

"I've never seen Tia Carmen so excited about a grand opening."

"For an up to date picture, I suggest we reconvene under the table."

Smoke and Mirrors: Harold couldn't work out why his new store wasn't getting any customers.

'It's a statue of St. Francis of Assisi. I had it specially made for my hospital.'

'Instead of 'You're entering a world of pain', try 'This won't hurt a bit.''

"We probably need to rethink our revenue strategy for the practice."

Surgery Instructions.

Ino & Frieda's 'Bed and Bagel'

'Virus?' - 'Yes, it's a Latin word we doctors use, meaning I haven't got a clue..'

Hanging out your shingle

"Sick? You're not sick! The money I owe on my student loans... now that's sick!"

"We got a report that you're rolling in dough."

Infectious Disease Treatment Area

'Level with me, Doc — it's contagious, isn't it?'

Grand Opening and Closing Down Sale simultaneously occurring.

A creamery, beanery and owlery.

"I've only just started practicing. I'm hoping the proceeds from these first few sessions will pay for a couch."

Nurse playing darts with syringes.

"Kevorkian was confident of victory. Heimlich only had the one maneuver."

"I'm sorry, this is all very embarrassing but we've decided to open a pub together."

Caveman turning the wheel into a bar.

"You see, sir? It fits you like a glove!"