Opening A Cafe T-Shirts

Narpkins

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'A cafe is just a failed restaurant really, isn't it?'

Man sees eatery, 'Mom's Cyber Cafe', below it reads, 'Formerly Mom's Diner'.

Ritz Cafe - Sorry, closed. Our regular, backup and emergency can openers are down.

"We have three house blends: 'One More Chance', 'Forget About It' or 'I'll See You In Fun Court'."

"Waitress, have you smoked salmon..?"

"I know you didn't order the snails, sir. They're complimentary with the salad."

'Enjoy your meal! We grow everything ourselves!'

We're here at House of Java cafe at an all-too-familiar scene. House of Java.net Cybercafe. Tommy Jones, a local boy, has been caught stealing a scone. A minor offense? Not to the cafe's proprietor. He's demanding the boy be sentenced as an adult. But I'm eight! Wahhh! Add a year to the sentence for whining and crying.

Give us a drink that says "we're in love." Oh no, not again. Today's Special. Latte + 1hr web $12.50. We're back together. We're celebrating. Give us my darling pudding pie's favorite drink. A cinnamon mocha latte with a peppermint lollipop swizzle stick. Excuse me?! That is not my favorite drink ... dear. My favorite drink is a cinnamon mocha latte with a spearmint lollipop swizzle stick ... dear. I am so sorry ... snookums. How could I have possibly been so heartless and thoughtless as to con

Party of two? No, it was quite a large party.

'Do you have any catsup?'

Like, Latte. So that's a vanilla almond with soy, extra foam, whipped cream, nutmeg, and caramel. Leave room for coffee?

"Who ordered the double chocolate parfait with a cherry on top?"

'If this is tea, I'll have a coffee. If it's a coffee, I'll have a tea!'

What nationality were your parents? North or south Poles?

Careful, the plate's probably still hot.

Today's special... donuts.

You want me to be a what? A hipster. My research shows caf

"Compliments to the chef! Pass it on."

'Which wine goes best with 'the old man and the sea'?'

'Excuse me, but do you have a decaffeinated baristo?'

Wasting away again in Cappuccinoville.

Hats and Food

"She'll have a semi-wizened, double ristretto with a dot of quail's milk - and please recite a poem while you make it."

"This is our soft opening."

"How fresh is the calamari?"

Joe's Kaff for Dinners! And Afters Too!

Hashimoto's Restaurant - Sushi Like Mother Used to Make!

Drink for me and my hot mamma. Now! We don't serve beer. Latte. Two, punk! Decaf. You don't want to see him angry. Also, low-foam and soy milk would be great. You don't want to see him gassy. Can I get one of those little Twizzler sticks to stir it with? Cube of brown sugar, please. And one nonfat blueberry scone! Two! I'd like to see how John Wayne would've ordered a fancy coffee drink.

"Your soup is delicious. The broth perfectly compliments the font."

'We don't know which gate flight 311 to Denver is boarding. These are the menus.'

'So it's the Mumm's Cordon Rouge, '98 Pouilly-Fuisse, '86 Chateau Margaux, and the '92 Barsac - would you like any food?'

Garlic Free Zone.