Opening A Cafe T-Shirts

Narpkins

'A cafe is just a failed restaurant really, isn't it?'

Man sees eatery, 'Mom's Cyber Cafe', below it reads, 'Formerly Mom's Diner'.

Ritz Cafe - Sorry, closed. Our regular, backup and emergency can openers are down.

"We have three house blends: 'One More Chance', 'Forget About It' or 'I'll See You In Fun Court'."

"Waitress, have you smoked salmon..?"

"I know you didn't order the snails, sir. They're complimentary with the salad."

'Enjoy your meal! We grow everything ourselves!'

Party of two? No, it was quite a large party.

'If this is tea, I'll have a coffee. If it's a coffee, I'll have a tea!'

'Do you have any catsup?'

"Who ordered the double chocolate parfait with a cherry on top?"

What nationality were your parents? North or south Poles?

Today's special... donuts.

"Compliments to the chef! Pass it on."

Hats and Food

"How fresh is the calamari?"

Wasting away again in Cappuccinoville.

"She'll have a semi-wizened, double ristretto with a dot of quail's milk - and please recite a poem while you make it."

"Your soup is delicious. The broth perfectly compliments the font."

'Excuse me, but do you have a decaffeinated baristo?'

"This is our soft opening."

Joe's Kaff for Dinners! And Afters Too!

Hashimoto's Restaurant - Sushi Like Mother Used to Make!

'Thank you so much, but I just followed the directions in the cookbook.'

Garlic Free Zone.

Non-Power Breakfast

'We don't know which gate flight 311 to Denver is boarding. These are the menus.'

"Good morning Rudy. I suppose you're wondering why I've summond you....It's time for your annual performance review...."

"You have a big check because you had a big wine."

'So it's the Mumm's Cordon Rouge, '98 Pouilly-Fuisse, '86 Chateau Margaux, and the '92 Barsac - would you like any food?'

"It was wonderful, Henri. Arnold had died and gone to heaven."