Online Sage Gifts

'It's all right, Dad -- it's a Buddhist chat room!'

'Human Error .. Yet Again.'

"Finally, after years of work, irrefutable proof that I'm a nerd."

"William Blake said you can see the whole world in a grain of sand, but he doesn't always make a lot of sense."

"I got all 'Cs', but I call that an 'A' report card...'A' for 'Average.'"

Wikipedia...

"Quantum Physics"? How am I going to learn all of this stuff? A bit at a time?

"So have you ever stopped to ask yourself: If he really knew the secrets of the universe, would he be living in a damn cave?"

"You said mindfulness could help us do well on the test, so I filled it up with as much as I could last night."

'This software package can cut your workload in half. Do you want to purchase two copies?'

One way only.

John Barth wrote "Everyone is necessarily the hero of his own life story." That he did, little buddy. But what if a person spends most of his life watching tv, films, Youtube, Instagram, Facebook, etc? What if my -- I mean, this person's -- life story is watching other people's life stories? Does that make other people the hero of this person's story? Sometimes I don't know where I end and Kanye begins. That'd be somewhere around Kim Kardashian.

One can hardly be expected to solve the riddle of existence without a computer

'I store all my data in the cloud.'

IMHOtep

'Do you think you can turn the company around without making us all dizzy?'

"Ralph - you'd play better golf if you had your eyes checked."

"You've done it - you've come up with the perfect password."

"The meaning of life! Have you tried Googling it?"

"Do I look like a wise man to you?"

"Remember when we used to waste our entire lives for free?"

"Why would YOU want to know the meaning of life?"

"Anything you say, Mr. Einstein, can be used to explain the origin of the universe."

Gawk

"I'll be answering that question and many more in next week's webinar."

"Rough year?" (2021 new year baby asking 2020 old year man)

"It's a weak pilot, but, if your stick with it, by Season 3 you grow completely numb to the show's quality and just keep hitting Next Episode."

There's the pay TV remote, the set top box remote, the TV remote...now where did I put the worth watching remote?

"Well the good news is that the new software analysed hundreds of thousands of potential customers to identify any that would have a genuine interest in the product. . ."

"It's nice of you to say so, Ben, but somehow the idea of 'Shakespeare in the Park' doesn't really appeal to me."

The past only looks good when you're living in the present.

'It appears to be a blog clog.'

'Wh-h-hatz-u-upp, dude?'

"Of course being celibate, all my advice is second-hand via the internet..."

'I back up my files religiously. I pray nothing happens to them.'