Oil Market Satirist Gifts

Saudi Oil: Non-Production Manager

Spot the difference.

'This country is on the road to ruin.' - 'Well, it'll never get there in this traffic.'

'Let's just wait here until the federal stimulus returns.'

The truth is, Congressman, we didn't know it was wrong to screw people.

Thrift: have your arms and legs amputated, use a pillow for a bed!

Made in China

'Blast it, Peterson -- What's this I hear about you letting our profits trickle down?'

'Let's hope the new norm means that less really is more.'

Fuel bill gone through the roof

"But there's no way in hell I could afford Jupiter today."

'The recession is over, again.'

"Allow me to introduce Recession. Recession is here to stay."

'We're all right as long as they think we're taking millions.'

'Agreed, 40 years is a long time to wander around, but think of the travel expenses.'

Early Attempt at Quantitative Easing.

"The economy's been worsening for a while, but people still don't feel it, Rudy." "...Which means we still have time to get in on the despair action." "Despair action"? "We're going to expand our menu. Add more comfort foods, more 'sale' items, debt consolidation loans..." "Nobody's dumb enough to get a debt consolidation loan from some random guy." "Ha ha hoo hoo hee-"

Vinnie's Repossessions: A Turtle has just had his shell repossessed

'The reason I have been able to keep my job through these turbulent times, is that I welcome change, especially if it's from a vending machine.'

'Bad news on Wall Street. The entire stock market has been downgraded to a 'junk' classification.'

"Thank you, and may the I.R.S. accept all your deductions."

The Euro - R.I.P.

Money god

Where Ignorance is Bliss.

'I think we're setting the bar too low.'

'Okay, let the minutes show we're not absconding with the money until the economy improves...'

'Wait a minute....!

Help! Have to pay back a big world bank loan.

"We need a market icon that reflects the ridiculous market conditions..."

'...and the Nikkei closed down on the day.'

Exchange Rate Going Down the Plughole

The Contrarian funds

'Give me something that will restore my faith in Equities . . .'

'My firm has scrutinised your budget and determined you could save a fortune by sacking us...that'll be £300,000 please!'

This government special reserve fund is like a cookie jar for crooked cronies!