Economic Satirist Gifts

"Didn't you used to manage our mutual fund?"

'So, it's taken you six months to finally finish the report on our financial crisis and your solution is: 'We need to make more money'.'

'The price of a stock will fluctuate on these three factors...'

"Is that just for the night, or for ever?"

Bottle of pills labelled 'Global Recovery Capsules,' with 'Warning: May cause inflation, deflation, nausea, panic attacks. Use caution when mixing with optimism, stocks, bonds.'

'Let's see, no current job, no job history, dicey credit report, congratulations Ed, you're approved!'

"Oh, thank goodness! I think I just felt the bottom..."

'Why don't we keep the law of demand, repeal the supply part,'

'Inflation is when everyone is so rich nobody can afford anything.'

'Do you see any signs of improvement in their conditions?!'

'You've filled out the loan application properly. Would you like an immediate denial, or one with the added drama of time?'

'Now's here's a newsflash. Recent studies show that feelings of well-being rise with income.'

'No, no, Eddy - it's your job that's moving to Mexico, not you!'

Unsecured Creditor, please help.

'The deficit is at an all-time high, and you want to do VOLUNTEER work?'

'Greenspan today explained the reason the Fed faises interest rates is so they can lower them again.'

Famous Last Words

House of Cards - Europe.

"No one talks in millions anymore."

"Why is the invisible hand of the marketplace always in my pocket?"

'Interest rates are up. Should that concern us?'

Stocks Market... "It's got an extra large hole for fat cat bankers."

'To you Herbert, your uncle leaves, as a hedge against inflation, a stash of U.S. Forever postage stamps.'

'...and the Nikkei closed down on the day.'

Business Confidence - Confident Rhetoric

Economic theory office with two boxes on desk - 'the rich get richer' and 'the poor get poorer'.

"It's inflation, Miss Borgia - too much money chasing too few poisons."

'Inflation allows us to live in a more expensive neighbourhood with even moving.'

'We're with you half way, sir. We'll return our government bailout if we can keep our executive bonuses.'

"The sky is falling - I just heard it from a very reliable source!"

'There's been no confirmation, but the possible merger of two giants has sent stock prices soaring.'

"If we buy two full price, we can buy another six we don�t really want half price."

"Look, I'm rich and you're poor, but in the context of eye-popping trillion-dollar deficits the difference is just a rounding error."

WARNING - Thieves Operate in this Area.

"It's Athens, sir. They're offering to prop up the pound."