Office Makeover Maven Gifts

'This gives us a more homely feeling than cubicles.'

"Marshall, somewhere out there, just waiting for us, is a loophole in the system."

'A few more years in this job and you'll learn how to delegate stress.'

Adhesive Tiles: Do Not Open from this End.

"Does anyone here have a clue what it is we used to get?"

"This new chair has the smoothest 360 swivel action on the market!"

'Kroft, Kroft, Kroft...to thine own demographic be true!'

'Once, long ago, I thought I was wrong...but it turned out I was mistaken.'

"I don't have to be a team player, Crawford. I'm the team owner."

Non-Drip ?

Corporate Team Building. Team. Hey, everybody, I've just been told our CEO fled the country while we've been doing our truth exercises.

'I think it's time to rein in Henderson.'

"Just go with the workflow."

'What can I do to create a climate where things get done?'

'Ok. Now I'm sexy.'

"Someone, call the office and see if we can get a fresh carrot."

'Sorry to interrupt Dixon - but this is not what I meant when I said this company needed more blue-sky thinking!'

Man finishing painting through flap in door.

Have you tried turning it off and on again?

'Yeah, yeah, yeah... I know the drill.'

"First of all, let me commend everyone on the teamwork displayed on this icebreaker. Secondly, let me apologize for some of the motivational language I used during this session..."

Man carrying his boss.

"Despite years of management training john still found it difficult to give negative feedback."

The worker/the man who monitors the worker/the man who wrote the draft policy guidelines on how to monitor the man monitoring the worker.

'There's an absence of leadership in this authority,we need to explore the possibility of thinking about setting up a sub-committee to look into it.'

"Love your feng shui!"

Modular Offices

Pollock Painting Company

'Office of not much budget, and even less management! Yomp speaking!'

"What kind of crazy management scheme is this?"

'Well, why didn't you say you wanted the office to be functional?'

'How dare you accuse me of sinking this company?'

'Hmm...this new management fad is crazy enough that it might just work...'

'Attention, all department heads: the buck stops there. I've had it!'

'This spider's web proves that you've done no work today!'