Oceanophile Gifts

'Dad, I've joined the Police: The Taser Unit!'

'For the last time, I am electric and I do not require wi-fi to listen to the land!'

"We found the poor thing stranded on the beach last summer and decided to adopt it."

"Whales eat billions of tiny shrimp-like creatures called krill. The krill are free but whales spend a fortune on dental floss."

"At times I wonder what I've done with my life that makes me worth being saved."

"All I do is swim and eat plankton, but do I lose weight?"

'Hold on just a few more minutes. I want mine medium well.'

'Thank-you God.'

"Four years of dental school only to tell all my patients 'Don't worry about any tooth issues - they'll just fall out and be replaced, anyway'."

When laundry ruled the waves.

I rather like bucket and spade holidays.

The Dubloon Stops Here

'You must be very proud Daphne.'

Lazy Octopus

Surfer Blowing Back His Hair.

'Stuck on a desert island, in the middle of the ocean, with only a palm tree for company, it's a bloody joke.'

"We’re a lending aquarium."

"Sorry mum, but I just don't get the decimal system..."

Try me/try me/try me...

Man listening to seashell: 'Oh, Rub-ber Ducky, you're the one ...'

Turtle Hat

"Privates Beach"

'I wonder why scuba divers always fall backwards off their boats.'

"If you hold it to your ear you can hear the ice caps melting."

'I blame global warming!'

Dolphin friendly tuna

Clownfish entertain sea life by hitting each other in the face with octopi.

Dolphins playing on a seesaw.

'This is where we go to get away from it all. . . except for Stanley's money.'

'It's true what they say: People often look like their pets...'

'You look gorgeous, honey! I love it when you wear your tentacles 'up'.'

Shellfie

A Preschool of Fish

STRIP God' s dog urinating on planet Earth

'The the President we've gone surfin', surfin' U,S,A,'