Numbers Magician Gifts

'There are lies, damn lies, and statistics. We're looking for someone who can make all three of these work for us.'

'And that's with massaging the numbers!'

"When you're nailing the numbers, they don't ask questions."

Uncle demonstrating chemical experiments to children

"Work hard. Save money. Work hard. Save money. Work hard. Save money. Work hard. Save money. Yay!!! I died rich!"

'First you forget logarithms. Then you forget how to do long division. Then the multiplication table begins to go...'

The Life of Pi

Time Is Money

Fred wonders if he should go see what's happening in accounting.

"And now, a little theorem for all you lovers out there."

'The path to becoming an astronaut is rougher than I thought.'

"The new revenue stream is finally kicking in."

I was trying to day trade my way through business school, but then the stock market tanked.

If Disney was a software company

Three businessmen using a pulley system to change a graph

'At the sales department, we've got to meet our performance targets. We're not here to care about reality.'

Counting part time employees is the new math.

'Brilliant, Prof.Brainstorm. Any fool can come up with a new product, you've come up with a new tax break.'

"My accountant is brilliant - he has just had a loophole names after him!"

Investing your savings

'And this is my strategic money reserve.'

"Well, I'm studying mathematics and I'm sure that's tougher than math."

Smiling businessman with rising profits

"Well, you say it's wrong, but it could be correct in an alternative universe."

"Everything's gone up."

"Maths is easy because it's so logical. 2 + 2 obviously equals 22."

'Eureka! After months of research and formulating algorithms, I've done it... I've discovered the secret to 'being cool'!'

Geeky looking guy looks at incomprehensible mathematical problem: 'And this equation proves beyond doubt that I have wasted my life.'

'Guess who made a bushel today?'

'In this class you will learn to apply the talents of creative writing to accounting.'

Professor of Fuzzy Logic.

Tommy, Math quiz. It's one of his earliest pieces.

Sister to brother: 'It's kind of like alphabet soup, only for numbers crunchers.'

The Forever Stamp

Man breaks piggy bank to find another smaller piggy bank inside.