Money Magician Gifts

"Oh I dabbled in hedge funds, sub prime mortgages, derivatives, but it was all just TOO WEIRD!"

Happiness is just around the corner...work harder, earn more money, buy more things...

'You should start socking a few bucks away for retirement.'

'I've found an Inheritance Tax loophole!' - Immortality.

"Really? You'd like to be part of this?"

"Your portfolio is too conservative."

'Well, maybe upteen zillion was too general a cost estimate.'

'Do you realize we're all getting richer by charging each other more?'

'I just came from our stock broker. Our quality of life has just improved!'

"This is Fluffy, my pet money."

Me Doing My Taxes

'By tonight we'll finally be in the black. We don't have enough to pay the electric bill.'

'I've got our bill payment schedule organized.'

'Though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I shall fear no evil, because I own the damn valley.'

'Life, liberty & the pursuit of tax shelters.'

"I'm in here...reallocating Dad's retirement account into junk bonds."

'Eddie, it's the market's way of saying 'there are other important things in life besides money.'

'In today's economy, it's important to put some of your money under you mattress and bury some in backyard...'

'I'd like to make a deposit.'

"There's so much money around now we've started using it as toilet paper."

"I wish I was less gullible when it comes to money."

'Quick...follow that rainbow.'

"Oh, goody."

"I'll be blunt. You don't have much time. In three days I'm turning this over to a collection agency."

"I'll be okay when I retire. I'm maxing out my 401(K), stepping up my IRA contributions, and three times a year I bury two duffle bags filled with unmarked bills in my backyard."

Woman uses an ATM with buttons for: Grocery, Leverage Buyout, Start Up Capital, Shop Till You Drop.

"I make all my own investment decisions. I have a portfolio of long term investments. Unfortunately, they all started out as failed short term investments."

'I'm your fantasy from the U.S. Treasury Department.'

Center for the story of whether throwing money at the economy really works.

'It ain't the Fountain of Youth, but it's close.'

Ostrich head in sand.

'Looks like the economy is recovering!'

'Yes, I'd like to withdraw $200. And could you make that in smart money?'

"I see no new taxes, followed by some new taxes."

Where is Goes