Numbers Gifts

'What I don't understand is how all three of us managed to get the figures wrong!'

"Some people think accountants are just boring number crunchers but actually 47% of 235 people covering 34%..."

"...They're not fighting over the bill, it's the receipt."

'Sorry - those figures aren't part of the equation. They're my lottery numbers.'

'Four million, eight hundred seventeen thousand sixty three... two? Wait... four... wait, oh boy, I probably should have been writing this down.'

'Every team needs a role player. And your role on this team, Bill, is to sit at that desk and crunch numbers.'

Before it even began this would become one of the longest trials on record.

'Actually, accounting is an exact science.'

'The jury wants to know which is more - bajillion or gazillion?'

'For people to think we just pluck figures out of THIN AIR is RIDICULOUS, we use a bucket.'

Today we learned to count to one.

"Helen, is it just the accountant in me, or am I sensing a tone of wistful melancholy and a bittersweet acceptance of the unfathomable mysteries of corporate life in those numbers?"

"The whole fun of accounting was that willingness to suspend disbelief."

'Every 'creative accountant' needs a muse...'

"Six out of ten statisticians prefer to be in the majority."

'1,2,3 4,5,6 7,8,9...'It's the little things that count.(little figurines counting).

'I was up twice and got one hit, which gives me an lifetime average of 500!'

Accountant counting falling snowflakes.

"Most efficient accounting team we've had around here in a long time!"

'I'll have 40 percent of what he's having.'

Painting by roman numerals

Accountants stranded in the desert.

Bizarre sequence of computer-generated random numbers

People think accountancy is just about numbers, but there is also the fractions, the percentages

'Why I'm not my cheery self? It's tax-time...'

"We're not so different, you and I."

J W D Butterworth chief accountant - Pin-stripes made of numbers

"Now is the part of the show when we ask the audience to shout out some random numbers."

Sister to brother: 'It's kind of like alphabet soup, only for numbers crunchers.'

"People mistakenly think that we accountants are all boring number crunchers, but the latest figures show that 54% of the 23% of people who responded to a survey were 45% in favour of us being 12% more interesting than average!"

"Before I get into how much more money I've lost in accounting errors, how many zeros are in a billion?"

"Eh, it's been mostly a round-down kind of day. How about you?"

"Sure, it seems glamorous, but nobody talks about the physical beating a number cruncher takes."

"They're non-identical twins."

Junior Accountant