Nudist Camp Participant Gifts

'Fancy a game of dress poker tonight darlin'?'

"Privates Beach"

Naturists feelings of joy evaporate when a slug climbs up his arse

"I've got pride but no shame."

'This book's useless - it just tells me to loosen her clothing...'

False Modesty: Naked sunbathing woman wears a veil.

'I've never done this before.'

Man at Nudist beach, watches a naked Punch & Judy show.

'Don't tell anybody, but I'm not wearing a robe.'

Success often means distracting the competition.

'Oh no! I think I left my wallet in the examination room.'

'I'm all for answering the call of the wild, but Bill really takes it to the extreme!'

'It's great that you get a boost in productivity from working in the nude, Paul, but I need you to stop borrowing my chair.'

'Nothing is what it seems down here. Most people are nudist speleologists, but I lobby for the pharmaceutical industry.'

Naked Morris Dancers.

'... So then, I dropped out of university and hooked up with this nudist colony.'

Nudist Beach: Beautiful PeopleEveryone else.

"If you get nervous up here, just picture everyone in the audience wearing clothes!"

'I get this awful dream where I'm walking down the street - Completely clothed!'

"I told him nudism in space is a bad idea!"

"How on earth do you keep your cool with all this naked flesh around?"

'Yes,I know this isn't a nudist beach but my luggage is still at Heathrow!'

'Well, well, if it isn't Ted Watt in the flesh!'

'Why do you always insist on a NATURIST holiday?'

'I know you burn easily, Howard, but you look ridiculous walking around with that condom on!'

'I've got nothing to wear!'

"Why yes. My husband does work in the construction industry! How on earth did you guess?"

"No, I'm pretty sure they're only easing restrictions on face masks."

"It won't be much of a holiday for me, did you forget I'm a stripper?"

'Fancy a game of strip poker?'

Hopes: We're gonna need a bigger emotional toolbox!

'Do you ever have those dreams where you're walking around fully clothed?'

'You have to admire these grand prix streakers.'

'Geez Neville, 2 million years of evolution and look what you've achieved... you're a nudist!'

Nudist Beach for people who shouldn't even think of being nude in public.