Nudist Wanderer Gifts

'Why do you always insist on a NATURIST holiday?'

"Privates Beach"

I used to love coming here. Nudist beach.

'I have one last question: this beach is clothing optional, right?'

Naturists feelings of joy evaporate when a slug climbs up his arse

'I wouldn't have brought the cat if I'd know he had to be naked too.'

The only way I can get through a nudist convention.

'This book's useless - it just tells me to loosen her clothing...'

"I've got pride but no shame."

Success often means distracting the competition.

Man at Nudist beach, watches a naked Punch & Judy show.

Naked cleaner in a nude exhibition.

"Fred, no one is going to bother you here. Put away the Bare Spray."

"What are we doing? I think the real question is, what are you trying to hide?"

'You pluck one more feather and I'm going to stay with mother.'

'What are they, men or women? I don't know, they're not wearing clothes.'

'Oh no! I think I left my wallet in the examination room.'

'I'm all for answering the call of the wild, but Bill really takes it to the extreme!'

'Nothing is what it seems down here. Most people are nudist speleologists, but I lobby for the pharmaceutical industry.'

"If you get nervous up here, just picture everyone in the audience wearing clothes!"

'I get this awful dream where I'm walking down the street - Completely clothed!'

If you find me an intimidating boss, try picturing me clothed.

'This is an ideal place - you're always saying you have nothing to wear.'

George was proving to be very popular with the ladies after taking-up nude pole vaulting!

'Well, well, if it isn't Ted Watt in the flesh!'

'I know you burn easily, Howard, but you look ridiculous walking around with that condom on!'

"Why yes. My husband does work in the construction industry! How on earth did you guess?"

"Looks like Fred's headed to that clothing optional beach again."

"I told him nudism in space is a bad idea!"

"I put the price up after the local council decided to make it a nudist beach."

Male nudist whistles at a woman in a bikini.

'I know you're retired now, Walter, but I still think you should put on some clothes.'

'How did you...never mind...ring the doorbell?'

Au Naturel Restaurant

"Great spot, Al. I didn't know there was anyplace left that permitted cigar smoking naked."