Novelty Item Aficionado Pillows

'We have a tour every hour, on the hour, Sir...'

'You're going to have to make some changes in your lifestyle.'

"Wilson, I built this company from scratch!"

"So, do you want balls that only go up, or ones that only go down?"

"Thanks—I got it off Amazon."

'The only problem is they're glued together. So I can't see the watch...or change the dead calculator batteries, but it's guaranteed for life...'

Family heirlooms that will never make it onto the mantelpiece.

'Now what?!'

'These new metal detectors are great!'

'Please enter your pin now.'

Who'd have guessed that the season's mast have item would be big springy shoes.

'The valentine card I gave you talks, plays music and flashes lights! Who cares about the message???'

Pam collected ceramic pigs. Just one so far, but even that seemed like too many.

'It even tells time in metric minutes.'

The Hooligan.

"I got it in a novelty shop. But it has decreased loitering around the watercooler with 29%!"

"Krazy straw"

"He must like you. He wants you to share his whoopie cushion."

"I didn't waste lockdown. I did my own facelift."

'I did say we were going to give you transport...I didn't say what sort!'

Spontaneous Combustion Man - Open with care

Thinks Bob: At last, the most practical house pet since the goldfish.

Drinking Hats

Shoppers of Mystery.

'Turkey dot com.'

"Oh my Gosh...I nearly sheeped my pants."

'Yes dear, matching novelty t-shirts.'

'You are here' T-shirt,

"I'm a hunter-gatherer-hoarder."

Dog with toilet drink hat.

'Could I borrow your giant scissors for a minute? I cancelled payment on this giant check and I need to cut it up.'

Surprise

'Welcome stockholders of 'Worldwide Novelty Products'.'

"You must be the new guy!"

"It's a belly button ring with a coaster to hold your beer!"