Novelty Award Collectors T-Shirts

'It's one of the perks of being self-employed.'

Clown on bike.

Christmas in the Fish Bowl

Hay Rides $10

"Wilson, I built this company from scratch!"

"Recalculating route..."

"Yes, I said bring me the king. . .But not that king."

Fossil record player.

The Slug Replaces the Cheetah as the Fastest Animal on Earth.

Cat Show

'I got this one for thinking outside the box.'

"Wait, you're firing me?! But I was Time magazine’s Person of the Year!"

Pipe Smoker of the Year Awards.

A crab with a utility knife claw

"Thanks—I got it off Amazon."

'Wait! That's not one of your novelty slippers...that's the cat!'

"I told you, Doctor! There's nothing in here!"

"But I've seen a million wind-up monkeys. Wait! Did you say it bangs on a snare drum?"

"I went with weirdness over quantity this year."

Peter Benchley's New Book Fish!

"Roadkill cookies"

'Each one is signed and numbered.'

Lavatory Waterfall

"The pea's the first vegetable I've ever grown. Can you stuff and mount it for me please?"

'This thing better hold. I don't know about you, but I don't find plan B very reassuring.'

"And when the extended warranty kicks in, we send you a big can of new car smell."

'The guy in the scarecrow shop promised me that nothing scares crows better than the 'Giant Fox XR50'.'

"You think you're gonna whack me and this will be over?"

Siegfried and Roy - grand re-opening.

'And it comes with oven mitts, butter, sour cream and chives.'

Two stressed drinking birds

'These new metal detectors are great!'

Who'd have guessed that the season's mast have item would be big springy shoes.

"I would like to thank all the big and little and in between people."

Inflatable Hands with Index and Middle fingers showing on sale for spectators at a Sports Stadium Event