Collector Of Novelties T-Shirts

'This thing better hold. I don't know about you, but I don't find plan B very reassuring.'

'And if you look to your left between the condos and the ABD store, you can see the ocean.'

Fly Football

Clown on bike.

'It's a difficult job, he needed a bigger than average 'stress ball'.'

hard-boiled egg...

Christmas in the Fish Bowl

"Wilson, I built this company from scratch!"

"Recalculating route..."

Hay Rides $10

"Yes, I said bring me the king. . .But not that king."

Fossil record player.

The Slug Replaces the Cheetah as the Fastest Animal on Earth.

The Hammer

Apocalypse Research Center

Bathroom Fairy

'Wait! That's not one of your novelty slippers...that's the cat!'

A crab with a utility knife claw

"Thanks—I got it off Amazon."

'I've found a spade I like Julia...'

'I don't think I've ever heard of the Geezer Scouts or Geezer Scout cookies.'

'Each one is signed and numbered.'

'Have you any W fronts?'

"Roadkill cookies"

"The pea's the first vegetable I've ever grown. Can you stuff and mount it for me please?"

"I went with weirdness over quantity this year."

"But I've seen a million wind-up monkeys. Wait! Did you say it bangs on a snare drum?"

Lavatory Waterfall

"I told you, Doctor! There's nothing in here!"

A close shave on the Titanic...

'Remember, before entering, make sure you wipe your feet on the hazmat.'

"What do you mean, it's not an educational toy? I'd have to learn to ride it!"

'The guy in the scarecrow shop promised me that nothing scares crows better than the 'Giant Fox XR50'.'

"And when the extended warranty kicks in, we send you a big can of new car smell."

Tin Can Operation.