Nostalgic Mischief Maker Gifts

'Sure, I have experience with hazardous materials. As a kid my brother and I loved breaking into the chemical dump and playing.'

Kid in time-out writes 'it was the best of time out...'

Newt sale

Only a penny! A sensible and ingenious toy for children.

'No, you can't use your last wish, to wish for another three wishes!'

'Mom! -- Jeffrey's pimping the wall!'

'Guess what I'd like to see disappear next.'

Teacher to student: 'Nice use of glitter, but you were assigned to do math problems.'

"I've just discovered this brilliant new ingredients."

Artist gets pooped on by lots of birds.

Child jumping on a table-tennis table.

Knights

Department of Foreign Affairs Foreign Affairs staff and their Mistresses from various parts of the World,having some fun in the office, witnessed by a stunned member of the public.

"...And I cheated at solitaire...twice."

God creates humans.

"Hmm. . . it looks like he was struck on the head with a blunt object. . . If only I could find out what the murder weapon could be. . ."

'He wanted to be remembered this way.'

Man defaces a painting to make it fit above his fireplace.

A trap for Santa

"That's not the boiling oil, that's my casserole!"

Frankie the discount genie

"It's festive. But I think it means no candy."

'I never dreamed that Lady Godiva would run AGAINST me!'

"No, no, no! My old 45 records do not belong in the craft box!"

"As you can see, we allowed you to bring your cell phones; however, this is hell, so even local calls will be charged as roaming."

Aircraft accidentally hits a witch.

"Great, I just made my last mortgage payment!"

Santa's sleigh up on cinder blocks.

"Do not feel bad - violence is acceptable when the purpose of the toy is its own destruction."

'Grandma says she has the perfect wrestler nickname for me. What does Tiny Terror mean?'

'No pennies.'

"Fred, listen. Can you hear me? The desensitizing cream - it's for external use."