Medieval Mischief Maker Gifts

"O.K., now walk forward causally."

'What's the score?'

"That's not the boiling oil, that's my casserole!"

'I never dreamed that Lady Godiva would run AGAINST me!'

Knights

Only a penny! A sensible and ingenious toy for children.

Newt sale

'No, you can't use your last wish, to wish for another three wishes!'

'Mom! -- Jeffrey's pimping the wall!'

'Guess what I'd like to see disappear next.'

Teacher to student: 'Nice use of glitter, but you were assigned to do math problems.'

'Have you tried hitting Ctrl-Alt-Delete?'

'The king wants a gesture, not a jester.'

Artist gets pooped on by lots of birds.

"I've just discovered this brilliant new ingredients."

"It's my wife - she's trying to lure ships to their doom!"

"...And I cheated at solitaire...twice."

God creates humans.

What have you done with the spare filter paper, please? I've made you a hat miss!

'He wanted to be remembered this way.'

Man defaces a painting to make it fit above his fireplace.

'I can't undo anything - I've forgot my toolbox!'

'Why are you hiding in the closet?'

'I'd like an older brother, please.'

A trap for Santa

Frankie the discount genie

Santa's sleigh up on cinder blocks.

"No, no, no! My old 45 records do not belong in the craft box!"

'Grandma says she has the perfect wrestler nickname for me. What does Tiny Terror mean?'

Aircraft accidentally hits a witch.

'Norman, why is it you're the one who always gets detention.'

'No pennies.'

"Well, it seems that St. Patrick didn't drive all the snakes out of Ireland."

'Our product testers aren't meant to be used that way, Sir.'

One C Battery, Two Double A's.