Nostalgic Holiday Fan Gifts

"Oh, put that blasted cell phone away."

Santa Claus's wife beats the soot out of his beard.

"Gilbert! Here's Mamma!"

'Another artisanal B&B.'

A gentleman giving some children a lesson in manners

"It's an ugly nose, but at least it gets rid of some broccoli."

'No wonder you're more tanned than I am - you are nearer the sun!'

"They don't build them like this any more. Heck, why would they?"

"I love your shadow, it's so retro."

'I said shag carpeting.'

'I'm not allowed in the water until I can swim.'

"This is not what I meant when I said you should try to live in the present."

Santa, please take a photo of yourself with our presents so I can post it on my Facebook. Thanks! XOXO

Christmas Star

Why are direction signs always so bad?

Rudolph the reindeer with a huge red nose.

Castaways at Christmas

"It's a great feeling to be able to give someone good news for a change..."

'I think Miss Jones is winning her fight against computerisation, gentlemen!'

Hell's angel Santa riding reindeer like a moterbike

'where do you plug it in?'

'She's dead alright. The question is: did she jump, or was she pushed?'

"So,as the advert says, we are looking for someone large with a lot of presence."

"All of the other reindeer used to laugh and call me names..."

'That's what I like, a good old fashioned Christmas.' (sign in window reads 'Out now - Do They Know It's Christmas!')

Santa crawling out of log burning stove.

"I thought you only came once a year."

"You've broken half me solar panels, ya t***a!"

'I remember when we used to have to watch one football game at a time.'

Christmas Lights

'Peace on Earth!'

Smoking Jackets.

'Of course, I remember when we had to make do with just 3.2 megapixels...'

Happy Xmas

'Congratulations! I'm giving you the sack!'