Non-religious Thinker Gifts

Atheism inc. - A Not-For-Prophet Organisation

'Let's not go by the book.'

'The church says the Earth is flat, but I know that it is round for I have seen the shadow on the Moon, and I have more faith in a shadow than in the Church.'

reincarnated worm...

"Your son is asking a lot of questions about the giant hands in the sky that controls everything."

"No, ma'am. I'm not sure what the difference is between being creative or just plain weird."

"To be honest, I don't mind the cold, and being an introvert, and slightly antisocial, I really treasure the quiet time when the others have flown south..."

Denmark scrapped anti-blasphemy law!

'You'll never believe this - they've found the actual body of Jesus!'

Cactus seats.

'Rehab centre' "I'm addicted to Irvine Welsh"

"May I offer a very different scenario?"

'God's forgiveness of sins ... is that like a spiritual bailout program?'

Christian and Born again Christian...

You are much more likely to think outside the box if it is broken.

"Things are looking up!"

"It's going to be huge! Cheese-flavored vodka!"

"Every now and then, I find myself in a room filled with people who are wrong."

'I won't be coming to church any more, Reverend -- I've decided to convert to golf.'

"When you're nailing the numbers, they don't ask questions."

'Follow this diet, and soon the temple of your soul will just be a small chapel.'

'As part of our alternative budget management strategy we've got Tim on 'Hail Marys' in here and Geoff sacrificing a goat to Woden next door!'

Pastor's Bumper Sticker: Save the Congregation

'Just do the presentation Williams and let the numbers speak for themself.'

"I may have wasted my life, but at least I don't look stupid."

"Remember that it is easier for a camel to pass through the eye of a needle than for a rich man to enter the Kingdom of Heaven

'This stuff is all well and good son, but when are you going to get a proper job?'

"This is never going to work—you're a tree!"

"I don't see HIS name on it."

'Get an afterlife!'

10 Commandments Exceptions.

Angel sees FIRE EXIT sign on trap door in cloud.

'Sometimes I scare myself when I realize that I always was and always will be.'

"Every once in a while he gets nostalgic for Woodstock."

"Hold on - the ref is checking the rule book."