Unconventional Thinkers Gifts

"It's going to be huge! Cheese-flavored vodka!"

'It's a crazy price but I think it's me.'

Welcome, Society of Backwards Walkers.

'It's my own fault, I encouraged him to give up cigarettes in favour of a pipe. It was while we were on holiday in the Swiss Alps!'

"Every once in a while he gets nostalgic for Woodstock."

'-not too early,are we?'

Baseball.

Just 10 minutes into the evening, Betsy resolved to cancel her online dating membership.

Too Weird to Have a Husband

"I spoke to Tommy about going to university. He said he would rather get into computer fraud."

"I can't wrap so I shellacked it."

Mobile crem

"No, ma'am. I'm not sure what the difference is between being creative or just plain weird."

"Try thinking about something else."

"To be honest, I don't mind the cold, and being an introvert, and slightly antisocial, I really treasure the quiet time when the others have flown south..."

"Lori, go ahead and toss in 'Lolita.' Now, what's next?" "We'll need more lighter fluid." "'The Lottery' is devils work." "We must protect the children." "Book burning club"

Cactus seats.

'Rehab centre' "I'm addicted to Irvine Welsh"

"May I offer a very different scenario?"

"Things are looking up!"

"Sure, money may be imaginary - but at least it's got everybody imagining it."

You are much more likely to think outside the box if it is broken.

"Every now and then, I find myself in a room filled with people who are wrong."

"When you're nailing the numbers, they don't ask questions."

'As part of our alternative budget management strategy we've got Tim on 'Hail Marys' in here and Geoff sacrificing a goat to Woden next door!'

'Just do the presentation Williams and let the numbers speak for themself.'

"This is never going to work—you're a tree!"

A martial arts student saws a block of wood in half

You have reached the end of your brain...

'His thought process is non-linear. It bounces around like a tumbling tumbleweed!'

"I have to start thinking out of the box."

"He's a loose cannon with nothing left to lose, but he's the best damn file clerk I've ever seen."

"Hold on - the ref is checking the rule book."

"I didn't want this book to end, so I stopped reading it midway."

The New Age Dentist.