Noise Reduction Gifts

Noisy energy?

People asking a robin to be quiet.

"I don't know which soundbar the neighbor is using, but I wish they would turn it down a bit."

"According to this article, snoring can result in justifiable homicide."

"Sorry, the sound of your chewing sends me into a rage."

"Our open-space office really stimulates information sharing when everyone removes their noise-cancelling headphones."

Cat and Broom

'Oh it's YOU, Mike! For a moment, I thought I heard the tormented howl of a caged animal!'

Election Cancelling Headphones

'If I was wearing my 'what'?!'

"My neighborhood is getting too noisy. Traffic, screaming kids, barking dogs … I'm used to living in quiet desperation."

"Use the force to concentrate, Luke. The force and noise cancelling headphones."

"This house is so noisy, I invested in a bigger speaker."

'Quiet with your crisps please, I can't hear the film.'

"Listen! Hear that? Nothing is beeping!"

Rational explanations

"What the?! They're installing a wind-chime in our tree! I can't stand the things: we have to move!"

'You can't come in to play unless you wear cushions on your feet - My Dad's got a headache!'

'It must be nice having a job where you can work at home.'

Drum School/Sleep Clinic/Fire Alarm Testing Lab

The neighbour of the beast

Ear Plugs for Aliens.

'I'm a bird person. If he screams, I put a cover over his cage.'

Sneeze Police

"Shh, too much racket."

'Sure, it's nice of the farmer to leave us to graze freely in the mountains, but this darn bell is driving me crazy...'

Egg farm for sale: 'All that clucking and cackling is driving the owner nuts!'

"Jimmy's asking Santa for a drum set. I'm asking him for ear plugs."

'Not while I am the librarian.'

'THanks to this noise barrier I don't hear Eddie's snoring any more!'

"A little peace and quiet."

Noise Abatement Society

Noise abatement society - Hush.

Elevator volume control.

"Don't you find the ringing of one's mobile phone most annoyingly irritating, Terence, my good fellow?"