Newsflash Fanatic Gifts

'Hot indeed.'

"The leadership team wants a catchy acronym for a new social media app they're calling Functional Applied Relationship Tracker. Any suggestions?"

'Fetch.'

"Why do dogs wag their tails? Because it always brings results."

'Super Dog'

"I'm working from home today."

"I did the math. If we want to read all of Proust in this lifetime, we have to start tomorrow morning."

"Then one day, as I caught a tennis ball in midair, I asked myself, 'Is this all there is?'"

Obsession with the Internet.

Super hero dog.

Boy and his dog

"Throw, fetch, throw, fetch, throw, fetch. It all seems so obsessive-compulsive."

'For heaven's sake, Lois, when are you going to give up this mad dieting of yours?' (woman falls through drain).

'I'll fetch your newspaper and your pipe, but the slippers thing is just too kinky.'

There's a Facebook group for everyone... "Even Toilet Paper Mummies!"

'I'll bet you taught him that!'

Astrological forecasts of the rich and famous

"Why would I want to see anything that far away from my phone?"

Nervous World Markets.

"Give it up—Frisbee is your game."

"Honestly, I prefer stick."

"'City Slickers' was O.K., but, let's face it, it was no 'Claire's Knee.'"

"Watch his feet - if he doesn't step into the throw, he's going to fake it."

"The Curse of the robot followers: At first, Rob was thrilled with the all the attention and followers."

Political Debate, 'I'd like a word with the debate chairman.'

'Good dog!'

'He took a fetching class.'

"Tell the world, are you digging for world peace?"

'He loves to fetch but he hates getting wet.'

"We interrupt C.B.S.'s evening news with a special bulletin from N.B.C.!"