News Show Fanatic Gifts

"Our panel of experts will return to their discussion of the issues as soon as riot police have restored order."

"My new cable tv package has 800 channels. . . all of them featuring people screaming about politics."

"Davina McCall: Life at the Extreme takes a celebrity to the most extreme places on Earth!"

Assault 'n' Vinegar

Cut!

The First Annual Game Show Week.

'Our regular programs will not be seen tonight, because our Station Manager is in a 'Three Stooges' mood.'

Astral Projection

Adam and Eve on a Talk Show

'You don't have a license and registration, do you?'

Fred Dinsdale - Forensic expert.

'NBC has revealed plans for a new, humorous version of The Office.'

Super Bowl Halftime Show Barbra Streisand reads from her memoir.

"Tell me, Chuck, is barbarism the natural state of mankind, and will it ultimately triumph?"

Book Shop Plot Spoilers

"Do you think the 'Taliban' is: (a) a cellphone company; (b) a deodorant (c) a terrorist company

"Would the owner of the 1985 Ford station wagon, license plate METAL-1, please move your car so that the ice-cream truck can get through?"

It's only a remote, dear...if you want better programs you will need a wand.

The 24-Hour Celebrities Doing Something Stupid Channel.

Miami Mice

My secret of living to 103? I stay active throwing out junk mail and alert dueling with telephone sales people!

Nervous World Markets.

'Ok, Bachelor number 2: What's your idea of a perfect first date?'

As Seen Watching TV

Morgue - "Welcome to 'Celebrity Autopsy'"

Don't touch that dial! — We're experts, and we know what you should be watching!

Larry King

Men discussing a book on a chat show

"We can deliver it Tuesday. If no one's home, we'll just slip it under the door."

'I'm a has-been celebrity - get me in there!'

Political Debate, 'I'd like a word with the debate chairman.'

"So, colony collapse disorder - how funny is it?"

Out of Context Nite with Jeremy Clarkson.

Ask Sadie. Dear Sadie, I am 62 years old and was fired from my job of 22 years just before xmas 2010. What should I do? Sincerely, Irene. Attack! Stop! Enough, Sadie. Haven't you been listening? The mean-spirited, virulent partisanship of talk show hosts must end. People were hurt and some died. Aren't you the ultimate partisan, you coot? That's different lady! Fasten your seatbelts.

"Let's just binge watch this."