News Buffer Pillows

'... And now, the sports gossip.'

It soon became apparent that the vicar was an undercover journalist.

"They grow up so fast."

"I caution everyone to avoid taking the first field reporter job that comes along."

This is Lenny the leopard with the on-the-spot news.

If nobody had invented graphics

Obsession with the Internet.

Our Two Parties, Explained

'Now for today's numbers...'Bad Dogs' outnumbered 'Good Dogs' by two-to-one...'

There's a crew here from 60 minutes and they're coming this way.

"And the letterbox version, how does that make you feel."

Video Henge: made from melting and molding 3,000,000 obsolete VCR tapes.

Taking Credit after Voting against Stimulus

"Strawman argument terrorises conversation... News at eleven."

Stephen Fry

DUNVOTIN

Europe and immigration.

Local News in Heaven

'Mixed news from the federal reserve...interest rates will drop on savings but will go up on loans.'

"Please don't watch this show! There's a viewer trigger warning and a short fuse alert."

Newspaper suicide.

Moses Today. Due to the sensitive nature of this matter, my source wishes to remain anonymous.

Economy Slows: 'It's still too fast for me.'

Rock and a Hard Place

"Well, if you didn't do anything in North Korea, then why do they keep launching missiles at us?"

'My new browser is so fast I have to take motion sickness pills.'

'Mr. President, I have a question, where's the mens' room?'

'That was a flagrant misconduct of the left hand.'

Bush and his exit 'strategery'

Presidential surveillance ass!"

'Now ask yourself Gerald, do we really need ALL these channels?'

"... And in Canada today ... nothing happened."

'If you have to ask, you can't afford it.'

"Screw this—I'm going to work for the tabloids."

Medieval headlines.