Comedy Buffer Pillows

Where did you get this?...Widescreen. Squirrels gone wild. DVD. (Originally published on 2009-02-08).

"Better bring me another cookie. The last one fell in the water."

Backfire

For speedy operation and ease of control get a pony.

"Bloody hell!"

"We don't call them 'horns' anymore. They're interactive audio crash deterrent stimulators."

A bear is sat on an armchair with old man slippers.

"Is there a vegan option?"

A man walks his dog wearing a cone.

"Britain's Got Talent is now in its tenth astonishingly brilliant year!"

'Yes... but is he a good watch dog?'

"Beware of the frog"

'This fish isn't tank broken - I want a refund!'

'He's our new Bone Specialist!'

'Sorry, but I'm arresting you for being in possession of an endangered wild coho salmon.'

Things my vacuum likes to suck up

Cat Hecklers

The perfect choice for president?... Stephen Colbert!

Rollercoaster opens when it is still being built.

Bird about to dive from diving board into birdbath

'It would never work out, Blackfire — our alignments are too different.'

'When I said you could name your salary, I meant you could give it a name.'

Castro's successful invasion of miami beach.

'He bought a donkey because he thought he might get a kick out of it.'

"I'm sorry, Chuckles. We had to remove your funny bone."

"All it will do is move crime to the South Pole."

Miami Mice

'Okay, I'm going to make the phone ring just once, and I want you to refrain from picking up. Bite the towel if you have to.

Somewhere in France: "I thought I was buying goat cheese. I endedup with a chateau in the Loire."

Pyjamas - Party, Sleep and Dawn Raid.

Mime walking dog passes some invisible dog poop.

Trump and the Gender Inclusive Restroom

"Is it 'Measure once, cut twice?' Or 'Cut once, then measure?' Or maybe it's..."

'And you're sure you handed the baby to me?'

'The pills stopped your depression but we may need to adjust the dosage, Sister Naomi.'