Newborn Photography Session Pillows

'Dad's always wanting to take pictures. it's so hard to smile with your mouth full.'

"Her first word was 'paparazzi'. "

'I've had some baby sized clubs made.'

A newborn parachutes to safety after the stork carrying him gets hit by a plane.

"Congratulations, it's a lifetime of penury and countless sleepless nights!"

Baby's first thought...Daddy's a moron.

"Same old same old. How about you?"

'Why can't we trade him to that lady for her two little girls?'

'Well,he certainly has his father's nose!'

Amazon Drones Delivering Babies

Doughboy Dad

'Shhh... It's babies app time.'

'Hey, big deal! We're all new kids on the block!'

A family trying to make a child smile for a photo

Mythical Family of Four.

Mime Baby

"Give her some space! She's overdosing on baby talk!"

"Hurray! I just got born!"

'Congratulations Mr. Dumley, you have a lovely little thing...'

'And you're sure you handed the baby to me?'

Impractical Guide to Having Babies: This is solids?

"Congratulations! It's a pain in the ass."

Baby on board 2020

Bouncing baby

'Oh Darling look. He's got your colour boogies!'

Newborn bird sees tortoise and starts wearing shell.

"No, they didn't live happily ever after, but they fared pretty well relative to every other miserable slop in the Dark Ages."

'Your stork story got me to thinking, Dad -- wouldn't it be simpler if people just did it like dogs and cats do?'

Maternity tattoos

Family Portrait Abuse.

'This is a rarity in today's world. No corporate sponsorship signs in here.'

"Triple whammy."

"Let's split up the jobs for taking care of the baby. I'll take care of what goes in to him. . . you take care of what goes out!"