Newbie Humor Fan Gifts

"I'm new to this tank, fellas. What's the food like around here?"

The Games Man: Fishing is his sole form of exercise - but he considers it bad form to move more than his wrist when casting.

'I'm reading aloud, Jeremy - My lips are SUPPOSED to be moving!'

"Welcome to the bank - you'll start at the bottom."

"Yes. I said 2 by 2, but you needed to use 2 by 4s for the Ark...begin again."

"Thor! I am Thor! Ha. Just kidding. I'm Tom the Seagull."

Police Feline Unit

"Go ahead and eat her, she's a pain in the a**."

"Clear my schedule for the next five minutes. I feel the need for some spontaneous frivolity."

Formal SuitsBusiness SuitsBirthday Suits.

"Better bring me another cookie. The last one fell in the water."

'Joe took the day off to go to the ball game. So I'll be sitting in for him until he gets back. Would you like me to fetch you something?'

'Well, it's your fault for wearing my slippers.'

"Cheers! Well, this is exciting. I've never had a dinner date with a duck before." "Relax, honey. I'm just here for the bread."

"I call it 'Bad Dog.'"

'Think I preferred the old Irish barman.'

'Why didn't he take 8 days and finish the job properly?'

"I know you didn't order the snails, sir. They're complimentary with the salad."

Party of two? No, it was quite a large party.

'I can't force jocose if I'm not feeling it.'

Do Not Resuscitate

"Don't flutter your little wings on company time."

Doctor examining Easter Island statue.

Cariactures

Speed Dating for Turtles

"Yes, I'm from London. 'Which part?' you ask. Well all of me!"

Faster, Georges, faster!

A woman floats in the pool under the shade of an airplane

Covid Inquiry / Enquiry

"Did you sleep awkwardly again?"

Selling lemon latt�

'Cannonball!'

'Actually, accounting is an exact science.'

'‘Because I said so' or ‘Just wait until you have kids of your own' section?'

Here and There Trays