Nerdy Humor Fan Gifts

You've lost an electron? Are you sure you're all right? I'm positive.

Trainspotters a group of trainspotters outside a church taking down details of a Bride's wedding gown train

"This is a lovely old song that tells of a young woman who leaves her cottage, and goes off to work. She arrives at her destination, and places some solid NHHS in a flask containing 0.50 atm ofammonia, and attempts to determine the pressures of ammonia and hydrogen sulide when equilibrium is reached."

"Better bring me another cookie. The last one fell in the water."

'I didn't dedicate my book, A Lifetime of Wine Tasting, to my 3 ex-wives and nine kids, because they made it possible. I did it because they made it necessary.'

"It better not be any of that over oaked chardonnay."

'The ghost walks this passage every night Monday to Friday. He has weekends off.'

"I'm not here to slay you. I'm here to talk to you about diversifying your investment portfolio."

Molecules You Ought to be Aware of.

'Taxes are going up, but that's no excuse to earn less, Mr. Syms.'

"Don't shave it. It gives your face character."

Odd Angles,a monthly strip on coarse angling.

'The world already ended, but the government hushed it up.'

The Brothers Grime

10 K Tail-Chase

Introducing...Anagraman.

Goat about goat: 'He's no longer gruff since he's been on Prozac.'

Murder in Apartment 6-K

'We're going to need to find a scapegoat.'

Race track - with the race being to apply the white lines between lanes

'Seriously, in this day and age, how can people still believe in this nonsense that we have evolved from microbes...?'

'-and you're living proof that ALL men are not born equal, runt!'

Trump Poutine

'They help with my nicotine patch addiction.'

"You see, it's perfectly safe to tease him..."

Pastry Hat

Mystery Solved - Boxers or Briefs, 'Thanks but you could have just told me.'

'Check out the old dude.'

"Grapes, Rye, Malt... I got into this through my vegetarianism."

'What did I tell you? There's always a catch to those bargain internet travel fares...'

"Uh Oh! Jehovah's"

'It's the same everywhere: body over brains.'

"Sorry, dear... I don't have a pumpkin spiced flat white chai latte. I just have this one..."

Next year, we are NOT going to Costco.

"If you think you made a stink pulling the fruit, try pulling His finger."