Nerdy Humor Enthusiast Gifts

If you think Unicorns are lame, you should see a Unicorny.

"This is a lovely old song that tells of a young woman who leaves her cottage, and goes off to work. She arrives at her destination, and places some solid NHHS in a flask containing 0.50 atm ofammonia, and attempts to determine the pressures of ammonia and hydrogen sulide when equilibrium is reached."

The Games Man: Fishing is his sole form of exercise - but he considers it bad form to move more than his wrist when casting.

'I'm reading aloud, Jeremy - My lips are SUPPOSED to be moving!'

"Welcome to the bank - you'll start at the bottom."

"Yes. I said 2 by 2, but you needed to use 2 by 4s for the Ark...begin again."

"Go ahead and eat her, she's a pain in the a**."

Police Feline Unit

"Thor! I am Thor! Ha. Just kidding. I'm Tom the Seagull."

Formal SuitsBusiness SuitsBirthday Suits.

"Clear my schedule for the next five minutes. I feel the need for some spontaneous frivolity."

'Joe took the day off to go to the ball game. So I'll be sitting in for him until he gets back. Would you like me to fetch you something?'

'Well, it's your fault for wearing my slippers.'

"I call it 'Bad Dog.'"

"Cheers! Well, this is exciting. I've never had a dinner date with a duck before." "Relax, honey. I'm just here for the bread."

'Think I preferred the old Irish barman.'

"I know you didn't order the snails, sir. They're complimentary with the salad."

'Why didn't he take 8 days and finish the job properly?'

Cariactures

Selling lemon latt�

Speed Dating for Turtles

"Did you sleep awkwardly again?"

Do Not Resuscitate

"Don't flutter your little wings on company time."

A woman floats in the pool under the shade of an airplane

'I can't force jocose if I'm not feeling it.'

"Yes, I'm from London. 'Which part?' you ask. Well all of me!"

Covid Inquiry / Enquiry

Doctor examining Easter Island statue.

Party of two? No, it was quite a large party.

Faster, Georges, faster!

'Cannonball!'

'Senior management wanted me to raise morale so I made Lionel from accounts 'office jester'!'

Here and There Trays

'Actually, accounting is an exact science.'