Bizarre Humor Enthusiast Gifts

"You need the booze dog. I'm the crack cocaine dog."

The Games Man: Fishing is his sole form of exercise - but he considers it bad form to move more than his wrist when casting.

'I'm reading aloud, Jeremy - My lips are SUPPOSED to be moving!'

"Welcome to the bank - you'll start at the bottom."

"Thor! I am Thor! Ha. Just kidding. I'm Tom the Seagull."

Police Feline Unit

"Go ahead and eat her, she's a pain in the a**."

'In its new 'spirit of evenhandedness,' the U. S. Government today sent troops to occupy all foreign countries....'

"Clear my schedule for the next five minutes. I feel the need for some spontaneous frivolity."

Formal SuitsBusiness SuitsBirthday Suits.

'Well, it's your fault for wearing my slippers.'

'Joe took the day off to go to the ball game. So I'll be sitting in for him until he gets back. Would you like me to fetch you something?'

"I know you didn't order the snails, sir. They're complimentary with the salad."

"Cheers! Well, this is exciting. I've never had a dinner date with a duck before." "Relax, honey. I'm just here for the bread."

'Think I preferred the old Irish barman.'

"I call it 'Bad Dog.'"

'Why didn't he take 8 days and finish the job properly?'

"Don't flutter your little wings on company time."

Selling lemon latt�

A woman floats in the pool under the shade of an airplane

Party of two? No, it was quite a large party.

Faster, Georges, faster!

"Did you sleep awkwardly again?"

Cariactures

"Yes, I'm from London. 'Which part?' you ask. Well all of me!"

Do Not Resuscitate

Covid Inquiry / Enquiry

'I can't force jocose if I'm not feeling it.'

'Cannonball!'

'‘Because I said so' or ‘Just wait until you have kids of your own' section?'

'Senior management wanted me to raise morale so I made Lionel from accounts 'office jester'!'

Ancient Landmarks of New York City

'I've learned a lot about myself at these meetings...like, I can fall asleep with my eyes open!'