New Sibling Pillows

"Forward and backward, not up and down!"

'Why can't we trade him to that lady for her two little girls?'

"My mom's having a baby. That automatically moves me into a middle management capacity within the family infrastructure."

'Hers his. That's not fair.'

Boy slides down handrail.

"She's cute, but she's eroding my power base."

'Nice job. You just made me a middle child. Years of therapy, here I come.'

'I didn't really want a baby brother, I wanted a rabbit.'

"Send ME to bed early, will they?"

Windmill

"It's not a coincidence! We are the same age, we come from the same colony, so of course, my mum is the Queen too!"

"So, the inevitable sequel."

Child driving a toy car

"Any possibility of a puppy?"

"Mom says he's a bouncing baby boy. . . wanna try it?"

'Oh, nothing, just babysitting the Lord of the Rings.'

Family wearing shin guards to protect against the kid in a play car.

A man pushing a pram

"Hey! That's my little brother! Only I get to bully him."

'Watch out for my little brother -- he's clothing-optional.'

'We had a full and frank exchange of views, and then I bopped him.'

That's not what I meant when I said play with your baby brother!

"I'm fine with another mouth to feed, as long as he doesn't eat my portion of the pizza."

"Your priorities change once you get a new toy."

"If I do that to my own Barbie, imagine what might happen to a tattle-tale."

"Hot chocolate, straight. ...make it a double."

Children's Dreams on Christmas Eve

Boy balancing a baby on his feet

Freak Family.

"Mom, when the baby's born, can I have the bubble wrap it's shipped in?"

Timmy Gets Solitary.

'He doesn't really talk yet, but he does some sound bites.

'I checked with my Daddy last night, he said your new sister should arrive tomorrow...'

'My imaginary playmate can whip your imaginary playmate!'

'MOM! †Abby's Googling me!'