New Parent Club Member Gifts

Congratulations!

Batman at the Maternity Ward

Cry babies.

"Mom, Mom, watch me!"

'So far I've found out the doctor had something to do with it.'

That's my daughter, Alayna

Newborn Chaos

'Twiiiiiiiiins!!!!'

'All my children have been successful. Frank here is in the Oval Office.'

Maternity Arrivals

Chip and Fran Cooper: The Most Embarrassing Parents in the World.

"If you're going to drink, we'd rather you do it in the house where we can party with you."

'We had to toddler proof the tree this year.'

'Look at big woosy Sid, pushing his pram with two hands!'

Wow! Look at these cool shower presents. Nature's Baby Boutique. 100% natural baby soaps, changing pads, bottle holders, safety gates and classical music tapes. Plus stroller, crib and swaddling blankets. Without all this stuff � How could you ever have a natural baby?

Who Needs a Power Shower,

"I hate it when the baby f**ks my face."

Pregnant lady's shirt says 'Baby' with arrow pointing to tummy, Husband's shirt says 'Blubber' with arrow pointing to tummy

My child was student of the month...But that was a long time ago.

Husband for Sale- Pregnancy Forces Sale

Birth of a conspiracy theorist. Sooo

New parents refusing to change their baby's nappy

"Another round of iced teas, and would you please find a placemat that will actually challenge our gifted son."

'True happiness!'

"He did well in his exams. He got an A level in creative knitting."

Poo Bags

"His first fax."

"Now that I have a child, I understand the love you have for your dog."

'She passed potty training!'

Drink?

Right before baby's first text.

"Your parents bring the presents, and he takes the credit."

Two parents look at their new baby who arrived in a boxed with a destroyed instruction manual.

"Joey is very good at mental arithmetic: I call him little pocket calculator..."

"Another set back for the manufacturing sector. There's no way I'll make this delivery date."