Navy Aficionados Gifts

Seagull humour.

Cutaway view of Ocean liner.

Servicemen.

Viking on beach with rubber ring shaped like viking ship.

Boat wedding.

"This cruise is getting a very stern review from me, I can tell you."

Captain Corcoran, Commander of H.M.S. Pinafore

'Heavy seas tonight, Mom...'

Captain steering house through flood.

"Then, after college, I joined the navy. Wait, I think I hear him coming."

"What if we're just a ship in somebody's bottle? Yar, here comes me existential crisis."

'Looks like a good day fah haulin' lobstah, eh, Pauley?...Let's just say it became a good day fah drinkin'...'

Fishing boat.

Fish or Cut Bait

Lighthouse Beam.

'That strange smell, George.. is FRESH AIR!'

'Just in case there is an accident.'

A large yacht carries a small wood house.

'...the storm raged and the doctor got drunk to steady his nerves..'

Ship upsidedown in a bottle has rescue boat in bottle next to it.

'Hardy I see no chips!'

Says here the Navy's going to be patrolling the South China Sea. It could spark a history-changing war. Google tells me the last time a Naval conflict changed history, it was the Battle of Midway. You were alive at that time. How awesome was it to already be ancient when Midway happened? I never expected a question like that from a prepubescent stooge like you. Was it as awesome as when you saw Cleopatra lose at the Battle of Actium? I see you're bringing Google's a-game today.

'Clem,the doctor told you to get away and relax.'

COWMIKAZES

It became increasingly difficult for the captain to reward his crew and still maintain his ferocious reputation.

'So, what do you want to talk about?'

'Of course I brought the emergency flares.'

'Well for crying out loud, why didn't you do that when I asked you?!!'

'Carry on sailor, just keep swimming around the coast and stick your head up now and again.'

"Look lively crew, lest we be dashed upon these scrumptious shores."

"No, I said to swab the deck!"

Distractions.

Commonly confused homonyms: Frigate and Frigate

"Call me Ishmael."

'Captain, there's someone pissing in the hold!'