Navigation Expert Gifts

Mall Directory: You aren't here x - where the heck are you?

"Sorry we’re late, but apparently the journey of 1,000 miles begins with 'I know a shortcut around this traffic'."

"Oh wait, we need to be on the 1-9 North bound escalator to get to the food court."

'We had to cut expenses, but why lessons in map reading!?'

You're Here. Man, You Really Look Like An Idiot!

'The church says the Earth is flat, but I know that it is round for I have seen the shadow on the Moon, and I have more faith in a shadow than in the Church.'

Captain in a storm

'Are we there yet?'

"Mind the whale, dear."

Man stood by signpost to 'here' or 'there'.

Man on Snowdon with GPS system - "I'd be lost without it."

'My Pilot-Fish is on holidays, so I'm using a GPS System to find my way around...'

"Boy, that's what I call a maze."

Goldfish bowl on raft...

How can I enjoy that clean, fresh, salt air when I'm up to my neck in garbage?

"Eww - that whale's breath smells awful!" "You could use a breath mint yourself, lady!"

"Just one more thump. . . just one more thump."

'Well if I'm so 'bloody useless' perhaps you'd better read the map!'

'Slip Ahoy!'

'Well, it wasn't my lucky day... first there was that shark and then I bimped into a bunch of beaver!'

'It's true what they say: People often look like their pets...'

'Listen Honey! Sounds like there might be a little white water close by!'

"We have a potentially serious problem accruing on the poop deck."

"Touché"

"Well what does the GPS say?"

Saved...life is good!

"Take your first left and then keep turning left until you eventually float to the top."

Moustached gentleman

Lost around a military base.

Titanic: How's my steering.

'Typical man - why can't he just ask for directions?'

"There is a 5 month slow down. You are still on the fastest route. You will arrive next year."

Ishmael's First Day on the Pequod was Full of Surprises: "A harpoon!? Don't you practice catch and release?"

Captain looks out of a porthole and notices that the ship is sinking.

Recalculating!