Nautical Newbie Gifts

Man raised flag of drowning women.

'I thought I knew what a cubit was.'

"Sorry Capt., but it's a pretty bad termite infestation..."

Man following advice on preventing sea-sickness but becoming sea-sick anyway

Lifesaver for Captain and his Teddy

"Your sailing skills are improving but you need more work on the 'drop anchor' part."

Man painting over a 'You are here' sign.

Cutaway view of Ocean liner.

'Cannonball!'

Viking on beach with rubber ring shaped like viking ship.

I'm allergic to parrots, so I got an aaaarrrrdvark.

When laundry ruled the waves.

The Dubloon Stops Here

"Harry—Let's get brunch and day drink."

Boat wedding.

In a cycle - one bucket out, one bucket in.

'Heavy seas tonight, Mom...'

"This cruise is getting a very stern review from me, I can tell you."

'You say the ARKS are NOT two by two?'

"I got a swiss army hook!"

Captain steering house through flood.

'This is Onstar, how may I help you?'

Columbus Discovers that when Exploring, It's Not Such A Great idea to Bring The Family Along.

'Looks like a good day fah haulin' lobstah, eh, Pauley?...Let's just say it became a good day fah drinkin'...'

Farmer and FIsherman

Fish or Cut Bait

Lighthouse Beam.

'He's been there ever since he ate the parrot!'

"Shall I let them breathe."

Battery Lighthouse

Pirate

"Actually, I used them as collateral for a loan."

Fishing boat.

'Not while I'm driving the boat, Marge, please,'

'That strange smell, George.. is FRESH AIR!'